Growing up and schooling…

I don’t think there has been anything that has taken me back to my own childhood more, than standing in a playground, nervously looking around at all the other children and parents waiting for the gate to open on Esme’s first day of primary school.

We probably made the whole process of choosing a school much easier by impulsively moving from the city where we lived, to a smaller, more rural town. I, in particular had spent weeks trawling around all the local primary school’s just waiting to get that gut feeling I so desperately wanted. Unlike many other families, OFSTED results didn’t interest me, I just wanted to find somewhere that I liked and felt comfortable with. I’ve never been driven by results and feel, certainly in terms of primary school, that it is about becoming familiar with school life and preparing for secondary school, not SAT’s results and extensive amounts of homework. I initially settled for a school that was very popular and seemed to have plenty of good reviews and felt better than the others. The daunting thing for me was the sheer size, with an expected reception intake of 200. I knew this was unavoidable in a big city but never felt particularly at ease with it, so that, coupled with the sight of some local 10yr olds wandering along the high street to the local tanning salon before their prom, sent us running for the hills! Please don’t get me wrong, I’m no prude, nor an old fuddy duddy, but it scares the crap out of me how ‘grown up’ young children seem to be nowadays, and to be honest I find it really sad. Children should be children! Playing lego and princesses, den building or watching Blue Peter. When did it become ok to send your child to school in a touch of make up, pierced ears and a mobile phone so they could text their boyfriend at the age of 8?! Apart from anything else, what have they got to look forward to as they get older?

Moving was a massive lifestyle change for us, we sold our house almost straight away and due to the hideous expense of buying in the country, rented instead. It’s amazing how quickly priorities change, before Esme, owning our house had been the most important thing, now it seemed the least and a worthy sacrifice for the life we wanted for her and our growing family. I had images of her skipping through corn fields and playing outside all the time, returning home knee deep in mud and filth! Of course the reality has been a little (!) different, however I do think she’s maintained a little more innocence than some of her city friends and although at 11 she does have the pierced ears, she still comes home from the park covered in mud and the boys in her life are still very definitely just friends!

Ironically the school we ended up sending Esme to, was one I hadn’t had the opportunity to view, but I liked the sound of the secretary when I’d phoned up and the look of it from the website and it only had 120 pupils, 15 of them being the new receptions. I really hadn’t prepared myself for what a change it would make to our lives, Esme had been at pre-school for the previous year so was already used to her being away from me at times. It was just the feeling of no longer having ownership of your life with your children. Term times are dictated to you, and there is so much expectation of you as a parent. It was a strange transition that left me feeling a bit like it was more us starting school than Esme! Luckily after a few wobbly weeks, she loved it there and I was pleased with our decision to move. Along with school life come the inevitable extra-curricular activities and seemingly the extra parental activities such as the PTFA ( thats another post!) and the governing body. Before too long, we were all involved to the point that when Lucy and then Bella started I almost forgot to apply as school was so much a part of their life already!

Secondary school was a different experience altogether. There is such a feeling of responsibility to choose well. We only looked at two of the schools on offer and luckily all favored the same one. If I’d felt daunted by primary school, it was nothing to secondary! Maybe because it still doesn’t feel that long ago since I was there myself, I found looking round so surreal, the science labs still smelt the way I remembered and the layout and decor were much the same as where I went 20 yrs ago! I still felt a little in awe of the teachers too and had to remind myself that I am now an adult and didn’t need to ask permission to nip off to the loo! It felt like such a huge transition from our sheltered little primary but any anxiety I had was counteracted by Esmes infectious excitement and enthusiasm. She was more ready than us!

Watching Esme adjust to the longer hours, stricter regime and extra homework has been quite an emotional experience really. The change in her over the next few years is going to be so rapid…lets just hope we can keep up……!

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